Lessons Christians Can Learn (A Missiological Point of View)
Kathryn Bernardo and Daniel Padilla recently confirmed their breakup after being together for 11 years. According to Kathryn, their relationship ended amicably, emphasizing that it concluded with
mutual respect. Both Kathryn and Daniel acknowledged that they had been drifting apart despite their best efforts to maintain the relationship. Kathryn stated that pretending everything was the
same wouldn't be fair to either of them (Philstar).
The breakup appears to be a result of mutual understanding and acceptance of their differences, rather than any specific fault of one party. Both have expressed continued respect and love for
each other, aiming to remain supportive as they transition into this new phase of their lives.
Daniel echoed these sentiments, expressing gratitude for their time together and acknowledging the difficulty of moving on, but emphasized the need to embrace the future (ABS-CBN News). The
couple has asked their fans not to take sides and to support them as they both heal and move forward (Philstar).
Who Is at Fault?
The breakup of Kathryn Bernardo and Daniel Padilla, one of the most beloved couples in Filipino showbiz, has left fans heartbroken and searching for answers. While both Kathryn and Daniel have
stated that the split was mutual and amicable, it's worth examining the underlying factors that might have contributed to this unfortunate end. I'm weighing the issue based on what I see, and I
don't want to side with either of them.
They don't know me and I don’t know them personally, but in my opinion, Kathryn Bernardo bears significant responsibility for the breakup due to her prioritization of fame, money, and success over her love for Daniel. Additionally, her kissing scene with another actor Alden Richards has likely added emotional pain for Daniel. Daniel shares how he felt when Kathryn Bernardo was filming 'Hello, Love, Goodbye' with Boy Abunda. Kindly watch the interview. Ito, hindi mo talaga maintindihan yong feeling ni Daniel na may ibang kasama si Kath. Mahal na mahal niya si Kath, at gusto niyang i-solo si Kath... Gusto niyang protektahan pero wala siyang magawa during that time. Many bashers blame Daniel sa nangyaring break up. Pero iba ang nakita ko dito...This is a missiologist point of view..
Kathryn's Pursuit of Success
Kathryn Bernardo's career has been marked by remarkable success. She has achieved numerous accolades, starred in blockbuster films, and maintained a strong presence in the entertainment industry.
This relentless pursuit of success, while admirable in many respects, may have come at a personal cost. The demands of her career likely required significant time and energy, potentially
straining her relationship with Daniel. In the competitive world of showbiz, balancing a thriving career and a committed relationship is undeniably challenging.
The Impact of Fame
Fame brings with it not just adoration but also scrutiny. Kathryn's high profile means that her actions and choices are constantly under the public eye. This pressure can lead to stress and
tension in personal relationships. The need to maintain a public image and meet professional obligations might have
overshadowed the intimacy and connection required to sustain a long-term relationship with Daniel. The allure of fame and the responsibilities that come with it could have driven a
wedge between them, making it difficult to prioritize their relationship. We don't need to be smart to analyze this interview.
Financial Considerations
Success in the entertainment industry also translates to substantial financial rewards. Kathryn's financial independence and the lifestyle that accompanies her success could have shifted her
focus away from her relationship. The pursuit of wealth and the opportunities it provides might have made it challenging for her to invest the necessary time and emotional energy into nurturing
her relationship with Daniel. Financial success, while beneficial, can sometimes create a sense of self-sufficiency that may reduce the perceived need for a partner. I don't know if this is true to the couple, sila lang ang nakakaalam.
The Kissing Scene with Alden Richards
One of the more poignant aspects of their breakup involves Kathryn's professional commitments, specifically her kissing scene with actor Alden Richards. Iwan ko sa
inyo, pero sa tingin ko, hindi bagay sina Kathryn at A____. Napakalayo. Si Daniel lang and bagay kay Kathryn....
For Daniel, seeing Kathryn in intimate scenes with another actor could be deeply hurtful. Although these scenes are part of her job, they can blur the lines between professional and personal boundaries, adding emotional strain to their relationship. This incident may have compounded the existing issues, making it even harder for Daniel to cope with the dynamics of their relationship. As someone who values commitment and exclusivity in a relationship, I can empathize with Daniel's pain. Personally, I could never share my girlfriend or wife with another person, even in a professional setting—it's "over my dead body."
Daniel's Hurt and Jealousy
Daniel Padilla, understandably, might feel deeply hurt and betrayed by Kathryn's actions. His reaction to the intimate scenes Kathryn performed with Alden Richards can be seen as a natural
consequence of feeling neglected and secondary to her career ambitions. This situation can be compared to how God describes Himself as a jealous God, not wanting to share His people with another
lover. In Exodus 34:14, it is written, "Do not worship any other god, for the Lord, whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God." Just as God desires exclusive devotion, Daniel's feelings reflect a
similar desire for exclusivity and loyalty in his relationship with Kathryn.
Believers are the bride of Jesus Christ. God's jealousy is rooted in His profound love and commitment to His people, desiring that they remain faithful and not be led astray by other influences.
God cannot accept a divided heart.
“We cannot be half the Lord's and half the world's. We are not God's children unless we are such entirely.” Steps to Christ, page 44
Similarly, Daniel's reaction stems from his deep emotional investment in their relationship and the pain of feeling that Kathryn's actions undermined their bond. James 4:5 echoes this sentiment:
"Or do you think Scripture says without reason that he jealously longs for the spirit he has caused to dwell in us?" This verse tells us the intensity of God's desire for our undivided affection,
paralleling Daniel's feelings towards Kathryn.
Watch Kathryn Bernardo's interview with Boy Abunda. Here you can see the consequences of prioritizing fame, money, and success over her love for Daniel.
Lessons for Christians
From a Christian perspective, Kathryn's situation tells us the importance of balance and priorities. The Bible teaches the value of love, commitment, and putting relationships above material
pursuits. In Matthew 6:33, it is written, "But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." This verse underscores the idea that spiritual and
relational priorities should take precedence over worldly success and wealth.
In Ephesians 5:33, the apostle Paul emphasizes the importance of love and respect in relationships: "However, each one of you also must love his wife (partner) as he loves himself, and the wife
must respect her husband (partner)." This biblical principle reminds us that maintaining a loving and respectful relationship should be a priority, even amid personal ambitions and
achievements.
While both Kathryn Bernardo and Daniel Padilla undoubtedly share the responsibility for their relationship, it is evident that Kathryn's focus on fame, money, and success played a significant
role in their breakup. The added emotional impact of Kathryn's intimate scenes with other actor, such as Alden Richards, likely intensified the pain for Daniel. As Christians, we can learn
valuable lessons from their experience about the importance of prioritizing love, commitment, and relational harmony over material pursuits. Balancing personal ambitions with the needs of our
relationships is essential to building a fulfilling and lasting partnership.
Biblical Solution for Kathryn and Daniel
Despite the current situation, there is a biblical solution that can help Kathryn and Daniel mend their relationship. Breaking up and finding new partners is not the only option. There is the
best option for this couple. Si Kathryn hindi na siya dapat maniwala at maghanap ng iba... Kasi yong iba may weakness din yan. Si Daniel may weakness, lahat tayo may
mga weaknesses. There's no such thing as perfect man or perfect woman.
Instead, Kathryn and Daniel need to take steps toward reconciliation and healing and it's not too late yet.
First, Kathryn needs to humble herself, confess her mistakes, and ask for sincere forgiveness from Daniel. In 1 John 1:9, it is written, "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to
forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness." This principle of confession and forgiveness is crucial in restoring trust and love in their relationship.
Second, Daniel must also seek forgiveness for any retaliatory actions, such as secretly dating another girls (just an example but I don't have any evidence). That retaliatory action of Daniel
shows he is so angry. And why he is angry? It's because of love to Kathryn. Mahal na mahal niya si Kathryn... Ako usapang lalaki, personally magalit talaga ako kong
mahal ko yong tao. Ayaw kong ishare yong mahal ko. Para sa akin lang siya. So, the stupid things that Daniel is doing is just because he is so angry. So, the best solution is
"reconciliation."
In Matthew 6:14-15, Jesus teaches, "For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father
will not forgive your sins." Daniel's willingness to forgive Kathryn and ask for forgiveness himself is essential for their relationship to heal and grow stronger.
By following these biblical principles of humility, confession, and forgiveness, Kathryn and Daniel can work towards rebuilding their relationship. Their love for each other, combined with a
commitment to these values, can pave the way for a renewed and deeper bond.
Admitting "I Am Wrong" is Difficult
Human as we are, admitting wrongdoing is very challenging, and this difficulty can be explained from a biblical perspective and there are several underlying factors:
1. Pride and Humility
Pride: One of the primary reasons it's hard to admit we are wrong is pride. Proverbs 16:18 says, "Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall." Pride can make
us unwilling to acknowledge our mistakes because we don't want to appear weak or flawed. Admitting wrongdoing requires humility, which is often at odds with our prideful nature. But God can give
us the power through His Holy Spirit.
Humility: The Bible emphasizes the importance of humility in our relationships with God and others. In James 4:6, it is written, "God opposes the proud but shows favor to the
humble." Humility allows us to recognize our faults and seek forgiveness, both from God and from those we have wronged. Philippians 2:3-4 encourages us to "do nothing out of selfish ambition or
vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others."
2. Fear of Consequences
Fear of Rejection: Admitting we are wrong can make us fear rejection or judgment from others. We worry about the potential negative consequences, such as damaged relationships or
loss of respect. This fear can be paralyzing and prevent us from confessing our mistakes.
Fear of Punishment: Another fear is the potential punishment or consequences that may follow an admission of guilt. This fear can stem from past experiences where admitting
wrongdoing led to harsh repercussions. However, 1 John 4:18 reassures us, "There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is
not made perfect in love."
3. Self-Justification
Self-Righteousness: We often rationalize our actions to avoid admitting fault. The Pharisees in the New Testament exemplified this attitude. Jesus addressed their
self-righteousness in Luke 18:9-14, highlighting the contrast between the self-justifying Pharisee and the humble tax collector. The tax collector's humility and admission of sin led to his
justification before God, whereas the Pharisee's self-righteousness did not.
Blame-Shifting: Instead of accepting responsibility, we may try to shift the blame onto others. This behavior dates back to Adam and Eve in Genesis 3:12-13, where Adam blamed
Eve, and Eve blamed the serpent for their disobedience. This tendency to deflect blame can hinder our ability to admit our own wrongdoing.
Biblical Encouragement to Confess
Healing and Restoration: The Bible encourages confession as a path to healing and restoration. James 5:16 says, "Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other
so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective." Admitting our mistakes and seeking forgiveness can lead to personal and relational healing.
God's Forgiveness: God promises forgiveness when we confess our sins. 1 John 1:9 assures us, "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and
purify us from all unrighteousness." This promise provides the assurance that admitting our wrongdoing can bring us closer to God and cleanse us from our sins.
Admitting we are wrong is difficult due to pride, fear of consequences, self-justification, and blame-shifting. However, the Bible encourages humility, confession, and seeking forgiveness as
essential steps towards healing and restoration. By embracing these biblical principles, we can overcome the challenges of admitting our mistakes and experience the transformative power of God's
grace and forgiveness.
Do Married Actors Commit Adultery When Performing Intimate Scenes?
This may not apply to Kathryn and Daniel, but let me answer this once and for all. The Bible addresses the concept of adultery explicitly in several passages, emphasizing the sanctity of marriage
and fidelity between spouses. Adultery, in a biblical sense, traditionally involves sexual relations between a married person and someone who is not their spouse. However, when it comes to the
modern context of actors performing in kissing or sex scenes, the situation becomes more nuanced. This nuance could refer to:
1. Ethical and Professional Considerations: Discussions around consent, comfort levels of actors, and the boundaries between personal and professional
realms.
2. Cultural and Social Norms: How different cultures or societies perceive and regulate such scenes, and how these perceptions have evolved over time.
3. Artistic and Creative Choices: The ways in which filmmakers and actors navigate the portrayal of intimacy for storytelling purposes while respecting the
actors' boundaries.
4. Media and Audience Reception: How these scenes are portrayed and received in the media and by audiences, and the impact of these portrayals on societal
attitudes towards intimacy.
The issue of actors performing in kissing or sex scenes in contemporary times involves complexities that go beyond a simple or obvious understanding.
Biblical Perspective on Adultery
1. Exodus 20:14 - "You shall not commit adultery."
2. Matthew 5:27-28 - "You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery
with her in his heart."
3. Hebrews 13:4 - "Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral."
These verses tells us the importance of sexual purity and fidelity within marriage. Jesus’ teaching in Matthew 5:27-28 expands the definition of adultery to include lustful thoughts, suggesting
that the standard for purity is very high.
Application to Acting
In the context of acting, scenes involving romantic or sexual interactions can be contentious from a biblical standpoint. The portrayal of intimacy, even if it's performed and not genuine, can be
problematic for several reasons:
1. Appearance of Impropriety: Even if the actions are scripted and performed without real romantic intent, they can give the appearance of impropriety, which
can be harmful to the public witness of Christians (1 Thessalonians 5:22 - "Abstain from all appearance of evil").
2. Potential to Cause Jealousy or Temptation: Such scenes could potentially lead to real emotional or physical attraction, which can be a stumbling block for
both the actors involved and their spouses. This aligns with the warning in James 1:14-15 about desire leading to sin.
3. Heart and Intent: The Bible places significant emphasis on the heart and intent behind actions (Proverbs 4:23 - "Above all else, guard your heart, for
everything you do flows from it"). Engaging in intimate scenes could be seen as compromising one's heart and intent towards their spouse.
While performing intimate scenes in acting may not constitute physical adultery, it raises concerns from a biblical perspective regarding purity, the appearance of evil, and guarding one's heart.
Married actors, especially those who adhere to Christian beliefs, need to carefully consider these factors, discuss boundaries with their spouses, and seek wisdom and guidance through prayer and
possibly counsel from their faith community.
Ultimately, the decision rests on the individual actors and their convictions, but the Bible encourages maintaining the sanctity and purity of marriage in all aspects.
Sulad Jhun Cardeinte writes from Thailand. He is a doctor of missiology student at Adventist International Institute of Advance Studies.
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